Work on oneself as a quality of personality - the ability to change oneself in better side, grow personally, improve yourself, develop spiritually under the guidance of a Spiritual Mentor, educate yourself positive traits personality.

Once upon a time, an old Indian revealed to his grandson one vital truth. - In every person there is a struggle, very similar to the struggle of two wolves. One wolf represents Evil - envy, jealousy, regret, selfishness, ambition, lies ... The other wolf represents Good - peace, love, hope, truth, kindness, loyalty ... The little Indian, touched to the core by his grandfather's words, thought for a few moments, and then he asked: - Which wolf wins at the end? The old Indian smiled barely perceptibly and replied: - Always wins That wolf, who do you feed.

Work on oneself is carried out in order to become a noble, decent and reasonable person.

In all spiritual traditions, work on oneself involves the development of the mind in the context: do not lie, do not get angry, develop selflessness and generosity in yourself, the ability to forgive, be faithful, decent and noble, maintain purity of mind and body, do not harbor evil towards anyone, be simple and open, learn to take care of everyone - relatives, friends, elders, juniors and subordinates.

People are under the influence of three energies: goodness, passion and ignorance. Someone is under the influence of the energy of goodness, someone is enslaved by the energy of passion, someone is enslaved by the energy of ignorance. Being in the material world, one inevitably falls under the influence of one of the three energies. If a person naively believes that he is free, then he is already enslaved by this illusion.

Psychologist Oleg Torsunov writes: “Everything in this world consists of three energies - goodness, passion and ignorance. And, if a person has decided which concept of happiness he has chosen, he has signed a law by which he will have to live, whether he wants it or not.

In one person there can be, for example, 10% goodness, 70% passion and 20% ignorance. This is a man of passion. Or: a person is 80% under the influence of the energy of ignorance and 20% of passion. This is a man of ignorance. If goodness prevails in a person, and the energy of passion occupies an insignificant place, this is a person in goodness.

Work on oneself - carefully and carefully cultivate goodness in oneself, not water passion and ruthlessly uproot one's own ignorance. Work on oneself is to strive to ensure that the palm among the three energies unconditionally belongs to goodness, while goodness has an offensive nature, that is, it shows a constant tendency to increase its share in a person.

Tell me, Teacher, why, despite the fact that I have been working on myself for so long, improving myself, going to God and ascending to spiritual spheres, my life does not change from this? the student asked. - Have you thrown off the burden of resentment, anger, pride, irritation, claims, prejudices and superstitions? And have you replaced them with love, forgiveness, compassion, patience and humility - qualities that inspire the soul? - No. - Then why did you get the idea that your work on yourself is correct, that you are going to God? At best, you stand still. With such a burden as yours, you will not only not reach God and not only will you not crawl to him, you simply will not budge in his direction, and it is even possible that you will slide down under such a weight.

Work on oneself is aimed at conquering the heights of human spirituality. This is the ascent, the vertical of human existence. This is the kind of work that allows you to become a holistic, harmonious and mature person.

The one who works on himself, improves himself, is pleasing to the universe. Man is a rational form of existence. The one who does not develop his mind signs the verdict for himself: "There is no reason to be in a human body." We come into this world to work on ourselves, to improve ourselves, to find our optimal path to God.

In every ordinary person, all three energies are present in some proportion. Work on oneself consists in the growth of goodness by reducing the role of the energies of passion, and, moreover, ignorance. Philosopher V.R. Tushkin writes: "Three qualities (goodness, passion or ignorance), mixing with each other to varying degrees, give a certain type of person."

In a word, goodness, passion, and ignorance can simultaneously intertwine in the most intricate way in one person. A person striving for personal growth takes care of increasing the share of goodness and, accordingly, reducing the share of passion in the system of qualities of his personality. He fights ignorance in the most irreconcilable way.

Svetlana Tereshkina, in the context of these thoughts, states: “The sooner you understand the difference in your energies, the faster you move out of the state of passion (when you already apply spiritual laws, but at the same time your goals remain the same,” I will work on myself so that this goat became silk and brought me a lot of money") into a state of goodness (this is where miracles happen!!! Husbands stop drinking, create empires, make a marriage proposal), the faster you clean your heart, the faster you think about the purity of your thoughts and start looking at yourself and working on yourself for YOURSELF, and not for others, the faster you will have REAL results.

Goodness is the ability to find the taste of happiness in selfless activity, the performance of pious deeds and self-realization; work with love, realizing your life purpose.

In the world of self-interest and violence, goodness as one of the energies of human existence is rarely encountered. Very few people are now living in goodness. They are considered weirdos. For people who are under the influence of the energy of passion and ignorance, the taste of happiness of blissful people is sealed with seven seals. He doesn't understand them. The interests of the soul or our true ego understands, but the passionate mind and insatiable feelings, of course, do not.

What we do not know does not exist for us. Happiness in goodness is a qualitatively different level. Theoretically, a person in passion can understand what is the taste of happiness of a person who is under the influence of the energy of goodness. An ignorant person will say: - Blissful? Not blissful, but silly, not of this world, fool - chok - chok.

The concept of happiness in goodness is: “I want to serve the truth. I want to serve God. I want everyone around me to be happy. And only if I behave in this way, let happiness come to me as a reward. I don't want happiness for myself. I just want to serve this world, these people. My goal is to bring happiness to people. I believe that if I do this, a higher power will protect me from injustice. And if, for example, I suffer, then this is how it should be. This is the justice that I must accept.

A man in passion is a slave of selfishness and self-interest. He lives for himself. Unselfishness is incomprehensible to him. He sees happiness in hoarding, in the delight of his senses and mind with pleasures. Unlike a person in ignorance, a person in passion does not go into open confrontation with others and the law, but his relationship with people cannot be called harmonious. Selfishness causes confrontation, competition, confrontation. In a word, a person cannot be in harmony with himself and with the outside world. Psychologist Oleg Torsunov states: “A man in passion lives like a slave of his loved ones, his relatives, his work, he is enslaved. A person in ignorance understands this and says: - You are all slaves, workaholics, you just need to live easier. You have to take what you need and that's it, and not look at the laws. If you want money - rob, operate on the black market. Make yourself a profitable business, take money easily, do not strain. If you want to have sex - go, shoot whoever you want, have sex. If you want to do something, if you want to deal with it, go punch him in the face, figure it out, they have their own jargon, mat. Mat means the influence of the power of ignorance...

In other words, ignorance is a force that forces a person to degrade.

As a child, Ivanov was terribly afraid of injections. When he grew up, he decided that he would work on himself in order to get rid of school fear. And what? He not only stopped being afraid of injections, but now he can no longer live without them.

A person in passion is enslaved by the illusion that happiness is always in the future, that it can be achieved by solving one's material problems. So the whole life passes in the realization of this illusion. In the end, disappointment comes from the fact that you allowed yourself to be enslaved by temporary things and missed what is permanent, what goes with you into new incarnations - a developed mind, positive qualities of a person, achieved personal potential, that is, what he managed to achieve in spiritual work above oneself.

Petr Kovalev 2016

There is a wonderful saying that says: "Until the thunder breaks out, the peasant will not cross himself."

Indeed, most people understand that they need to work on themselves when life has pinned them to the wall. Some take on healthy lifestyle life when they hear the disappointing prognosis of doctors. Others begin to reconsider their behavior if loved ones have turned away.

Of course, there are situations when a person clearly knows what he wants from life, makes plans on how to work on himself - on his own or with a psychologist. He purposefully goes to achieve the goal, overcoming all the difficulties on the way, in order to eventually become stronger. But there are not so many lucky ones. You can remember many well-known historical figures who, in fact, through long hard work, made their own name, for example, D.I. Mendeleev, S.A. Yesenina, D.S. Likhachev and many others. However, a simple person (such as you and me) will rarely be inspired by the example of at least one of these people, isn't it? We have separated ourselves too much from such comparisons.

What makes a person need to work on himself

What makes a person look at himself, his actions, bad habits in a different way? Life itself, which daily shows colorful examples: "Work on yourself, otherwise you will not achieve anything." When we understand that time is running out inexorably, but so little has been done, and we want so much, we begin to think. There are thoughts that you need to work on yourself, fight weaknesses, set goals and strive to fulfill them.

Often, health leads us to the need for self-correction: when a person drank and smoked and faced problems with the cardiovascular system, it's time to grab onto the mind. Sometimes external circumstances contribute to change - low-paid work does not bring satisfaction, a person cannot buy what he wants. Then he begins to look for another place, seeks education, makes useful contacts.

A kick from fate in the overwhelming majority of cases serves as a trigger signal that echoes in our minds: “Work on yourself or don’t!”.

Can you deal with problems on your own?

There is another good saying on this subject, which says: "One man is not a warrior." Any person at a certain stage of life needs support, sympathetic attention, a reliable shoulder. Whom to turn to for advice when the need arises and work on yourself is up to you to decide.

• You can trust a friend.

  Who will listen, prompt, cheer. Just do not confuse a friend with a colleague or acquaintance for whom your situation is a reason to “grind the bones”, and do not impose your vision on anyone in order to lure him to a joint start.

• Or seek the help of experts.

  An intelligent master (coach, psychologist) will teach you the “correct” introspection. A person, having attended trainings, will be able not only to see the problem, but also to learn how to work on himself correctly, fruitfully, what areas to pay special attention to, what mechanisms to use, where to look for strength and resources for change. It is important that there is trust in the master, so that this person is pleasant, does not cause internal rejection.

• It helps a lot to connect with like-minded people.

  For example, a woman decides to lose weight. Naturally, it is not easy at first to give up sweets, night snacks, watching TV on your favorite couch (instead of going to the gym). Perhaps the same people who want to lose weight will come to the aid of a losing weight person. Where to find them? Anywhere - in the same gyms, in groups of social networks, on forums. It is psychologically easier to accept changes when there are concrete examples achievements of people with your problem, they inspire and help find solutions. Look for such examples on the web. By the way, the same support group can be found at collective trainings, where people come driven by the goal of understanding themselves and changing.

• Go yourself.

  But sometimes a person has to go himself along the difficult road to the desired. And the lack of outside support is not a reason to abandon the idea of ​​working on yourself in order to achieve more. If the thought of the need for changes in life appeared in my head, it means that a small step towards victory has already been taken.

How to start working on yourself

Let's say you decide to change something in yourself - a habit, bad qualities. Or maybe you are not satisfied with some details in life - the absence of a soulmate, dissatisfaction with work. You can start building a life that satisfies you by following these points:

1. Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

   Realize, whining doesn't actually get you anywhere. Relatives, of course, may take pity on you, listen to you, but the problems will not disappear from this. So you not only harass others, but simply crush water in a mortar. Although the minutes spent complaining can be used much more productively.

2. Try to turn problems into tasks.

   For example, you think your character is terrible. On the one hand, this is a problem, on the other hand, the task is to become more balanced, calmer and more patient. Or you have an alcohol problem. It can also be retrained as the task of starting to lead a sober lifestyle. Cheer up, almost every mistake can be corrected if desired. And you should start doing this by changing your attitude to the situation.

3. Stop thinking you're a failure.

   Sometimes we say to ourselves the words: “I won’t succeed, I definitely won’t cope.” Naturally, after that, you don’t want to do anything, because we doomed ourselves to failure with just one phrase. It's better to say: "I'll try!". There are no people in nature who can do everything - moments of weakness, bad habits, everyone has flaws. Why are you worse than others?

4. It is not easy to honestly evaluate your shortcomings and advantages if you are not used to seeing the good in yourself. Take a piece of paper where you write down all your pros and cons. And then think about it, maybe some negative aspects can be transformed, if not into virtues, then at least in the features of your character?

   For example, others blame you for being unsociable, unsociable, cold, indifferent. But isn't that your thing? Your reluctance to flaunt your emotions does not interfere with your life, but, on the contrary, helps you focus and not commit rash acts.

5. Make a plan for working on yourself.

   You need to start looking for goals and paths that will lead to success. Moreover, the task should be as specific as possible, and even more specifically divided into subtasks. Not just "I want to be rich and famous", but "I want to get economic Education, learn English language, find Good work in the field of finance with a salary of 100 thousand rubles, to improve their qualifications, to rise in positions ... ”. If you have a goal to start leading a healthy lifestyle, write down in the plan all the points that will lead to a dream: “go to bed no later than 11 pm, do a 15-minute exercise in the morning after a contrast shower, eat oatmeal instead of sandwiches for breakfast ...). Always having a clear plan in front of your eyes, it will be easier for you to focus on its points and thus purposefully go towards your plan.

6. Do not deviate from the points of the plan.

   A person who works on himself will achieve victory if he does not put things off indefinitely. Decided to change yourself - start now. Believe me, tomorrow or in a week you will also not want to go for a morning run (give up a cigarette in favor of, for example, an apple or clean up instead of watching a series).

7. Enlist the support of comrades (friends, colleagues, relatives).

   Share the news that you started working on yourself with a person you like. Perhaps he will give useful advice, suggest something from his experience. However, stay away from scoffers (those who perceive your undertakings with malicious irony). It is better to read a book or take a walk alone with your thoughts.

8. Don't miss out on reminders.

   Sometimes people are very helpful, for example, notes with cheat sheets (“at 12 you need to do 20 squats, at 14 drink a glass of juice, at 16 go for a walk”). Use your phone, a cross on your hand, or a sticker on your computer to remind you. Sometimes it's hard to keep everything in your head. Such reminders will serve as an incentive to ensure that you do not turn off the chosen path.

9. Find practical meaning in the change.

How not to go the distance, starting work on yourself

If you are thinking about how to work on yourself, then you are already on the right track. Now, don't let yourself get sidetracked from your plan. Whether you call a specialist, a friend for help, or whether you act alone is not so important. The main thing is to strive for a designated point on the path. At the same time, it is not at all necessary to set grandiose plans for yourself - this way you will soon run out of steam. Set a small task, but do it as productively as possible. Suppose daily runs of 15 minutes will be more fruitful than a one-time marathon of 5 kilometers. Don't give up, don't feel sorry for yourself. Realize that only you can change your life. And believe in yourself, you will certainly succeed.

How to work on yourself, how to start developing and changing your life? Work on yourself psychology where to start

how to start learning on your own

Among the diversity human life the inner space of the personality remains unknown to many. And this inner life is in many ways more important for a person than the outer one, since the injuries inflicted on the psyche do not heal for decades, unlike the wounds of the body. This is well known to psychologists - people whose lives are devoted to the study of the secrets of the soul. And, of course, the desire to understand the other is valuable.

Those who have embarked on the path of self-learning must go through a difficult path. What are the main difficulties of studying, why is it so difficult to master the science of psychology; where to start studying? Let's try to figure it out.

Methodology

When a person decides to study a science such as psychology, it is worth thoroughly familiarizing yourself with the methodology of science. And devote a lot of time to reading various literature.

But where to start studying psychology on your own? How to find the knowledge base that you can rely on further and study science in depth? Without fundamental orderly concepts, there is no true science. First, the subject of science and methodology are studied. Methodology - a systematic analysis of the methods that are used in a given science to obtain knowledge.

Start with yourself. Why and for what

The beginning of the study of human psychology is the understanding of personal motives. First of all, you need to understand why the first step to the study of human behavior is being taken: in order to be well versed in the development of children and help them grow harmoniously either for their own personal growth, or you want to become a professional and get the opportunity to help outsiders.

It is also important to decide in advance which side of science you will study thoroughly: theoretical or practical. It's hard to find without knowing what it is. Especially in the ocean of information.

Psychology books. What do newbies need

What books to start studying psychology? Setting out to study the basics of any science, one must start from the basics: the most basic categories, terms and concepts - all this can be found in any first-year textbook. Such textbooks are available in all city libraries. Although they are not very eloquently written, and full of definitions and tables, they need to be mastered. Further it will be easier. After reading this first book, you need to find the classics of psychology: K. Jung, K. Horney, A. Adler, E. Fromm, and, of course, you need to familiarize yourself with the works of Freud.

Lighter and interesting book I. Yaloma "When Nietzsche Wept". You can then search for any author's book in the direction that this moment more interesting.

We must not forget that it is important for a psychologist to know the basics of philosophy and sociology. It is important to form humanitarian thinking, science is not only theories and theses.

Fiction also contains many useful information for a future psychologist. Classical writers clearly analyzed the nature of the inner world and the actions of their fictional characters. A particularly deep analysis can be found in the books of F. Dostoevsky.

Journals and publications

In today's incredibly vast information space, finding an accessible and interesting psychology journal is not a problem. Many universities publish their own journal and post free versions on the Internet quite freely. You just need to find the journal that will be informative and useful for you in the chosen field of science.

• "Russian Psychological Journal".
• VAK magazine "Bulletin of VlGU".
• "Experimental Psychology".
• "Existential and Humanistic Psychology".
• Online magazine psychology.ru.
• Other.

The online magazine psychologies.ru was created for a wide range of readers. If needed scientific publications, written by qualified employees of the institutes, it is better to read the official publications. Such as: "Russian Psychological Journal".

The world of psychology. Main directions

In what directions is it developing modern psychology? Where to start studying the development trends of the main areas of this science? It is impossible to succeed in everything at once, and it is required to decide on the direction in which a person will feel most confident, what is closer for him to learn and apply.

The classic directions are:

• cognitive direction;

• Gestalt psychology;

• associative psychology;

• humanistic;

And there are new directions: psychodrama, coaching, transpersonal psychology and neurolinguistic programming.

Non-verbal communication as a basis

Without what the science of psychology cannot be conceived? Where to start studying? A beginner needs to study both theory and practice. And practice, respectively, immediately work out: learn to listen, learn to pay attention to non-verbal signs. This practice is as important as learning foreign language proposals must be made immediately.

Non-verbal messages are a hint to the interlocutor; The theory of non-verbal communication says that facial expressions and postures of a person speak much more about the internal state than words. A good psychologist immediately "calculates" the state of a nearby person by his appearance. Even if you are not going to study psychology professionally, but are only interested in it, you need to learn how to identify non-verbal signs. This will make it easier to communicate with family and friends.

What qualities of character should be developed

Working with people is absolutely impossible without working on yourself. A psychologist is one who studies souls. This is how psychology is interpreted. Where to start studying the behavior and problems of others? From work on your character traits. Because without knowing yourself, it is impossible to know others.

Psyche was the goddess-soul, respectively, the science of the soul cannot be studied without love for the souls of people. It is necessary to be able to put yourself in the place of another and represent his feelings and emotions. A psychologist also needs good abilities for introspection and self-reflection - that is, the ability to understand one's own emotional state and behavior. The ability to establish verbal contact with any person.

Indeed, the study of human psychology is not so easy. Where to begin? Develop awareness. For a novice psychologist, this is a key moment. If a beginner is faced with the question: where to start studying psychology on their own, then it is better to reformulate it - where to start studying. From myself. A psychologist will not be able to solve other people's problems if he does not learn how to solve his own complexes, problems, fears and anxieties.

Proxemics

The distance and the need to observe it when conducting a conversation is studied by such a science as proxemics. The concept was introduced into science by Edward Hall.

Edward Hall introduced 4 zones into the scientific world of psychologists that must be observed when communicating:

• intimate;
• personal;
• social zone;
• public.

Understanding the inner state of people is not so easy. There is no point in reading books if the beginner does not know how to recognize the internal mood of the interlocutor.

A psychologist cannot put pressure on a person. When he does not keep his distance, the person will close and will not let him into his inner world.

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How to work on yourself, how to start developing and changing your life?

Hello dear friends! Many of our readers, who in their lives have come to the need for development and work on themselves, ask: where can and should you start your development? What is the best way to start the long-awaited changes in yourself and in your life? What are the tasks and development techniques for this?

This is great and very important question! Especially if a person had no spiritual experience or practice in personal development at all.

This article will give important recommendations for development and work on yourself: where should you start your development? what is important to consider? What are the most important decisions for effective personal and spiritual growth? What articles on this topic are worth reading and comprehending? how to quickly launch the long-awaited transformations and transformations own life?

What is important to know and what needs to be decided at the beginning of the development path?

It is important to decide on the vector of your development! Where are you going and why? After all, development is a journey. There are two main vectors of development, or rather, this is a key coordinate system.

1. Strength levels are the levels of human development (stages of its growth). In fact, it is the level of development that determines what a person can and cannot do.
2. The degree of his Positivity - what Ideals a person follows in life: the ideals of Good or Evil, or he is an Egoist and this is not important for him. In other words, where does a person go - to God, to the Light or to His opposite (to hell), or for him the highest value is his own self-interest.

These are the main vectors of development that determine which Forces of the Universe will help and patronize a person on the path of development, and in life in general. This is what will largely determine all the results of his fate.

Decide Who you want to help you on this path - Light Forces or Dark Forces, or you don't care.

Key decisions for your own development! How to start developing?

Development is a change in oneself, one's Personality, one's Consciousness and Subconsciousness, it is the disclosure of one's potential and liberation from shortcomings (negativity), vices, weaknesses, pathologies.

It is important to understand the concept of “Development” so that there are no discrepancies and contradictions in consciousness. For this, I propose to study the following articles that reveal this concept:

But in order to start developing, you don’t need to dive headlong into esotericism, you don’t need to stuff yourself with gigabytes of theory. You need to start with a simple, obvious and really effective practice - with answers to key questions. Moreover, the answers must be written so that you can re-read what was written, understand, correct. decisions. All changes within you and in your life begin with your making new vital decisions!

Key questions to get started:

1. Write down in a column everything that you are dissatisfied with in yourself and what you want to change.
2. List everything that you want to change in your own life: everything that does not suit you, what causes dissatisfaction, everything that makes you suffer, etc.
3. For each item written out above, write - what exactly do you want to replace the existing one (what does not suit you): A) For yourself, B) For your life (in all areas of life).
4. Repeatedly re-read everything written, reflect, supplement the lists, detail the replacement. The more detailed and clear you define for yourself what you want in return for what you have, the faster changes will begin and development will enter your life.

Important Additional task, give clear and detailed answers to the questions: what do I definitely not want? What do I not want to experience inside? Who do I definitely not want to be? What kind of life do I really want?

A written answer to these questions is very powerful, because it gives absolute clarity to our consciousness and subconscious, cutting off everything unnecessary, indefinite, distracting, everything that takes our energy and time. Deep honest answers to these questions make us as sincere as possible to ourselves, and sincerity gives us a lot of energy for future achievements.

Removal of blocks on Development and work on oneself

Past holdings, attachments, uncorrected mistakes (sins), guilt and self-forgiveness prevent us from accepting change and can often completely block our development.

Where are you deployed with your consciousness? How does your inner world live - the past? real? future? If the past, if you are turned to the past and stand with your back to your future - changes and development will go with a creak or will be completely blocked.

You need to work out your past - let it go, thank you for everything given from Above, repent for everything where you were wrong, forgive yourself, refuse to condemn yourself and others, decide that you only want Light, Goodness, Development for yourself, your Soul , Happiness, only all the best. Because “Development” is Good, and if you wish Evil for yourself, subconsciously or consciously, the flows of positive transformation and development simply will not enter you.

Practical work with your past:

1. Go mentally through your entire life, remember everything that you can remember and thank the Creator, Fate, your Guardian Angels in writing for everything good, valuable that you have been given in life, thank fate for everything given, incl. and for the trials that have made you stronger and wiser. Write from the heart and in as much detail as possible a prayer of gratitude to the Higher Forces for the life you have already lived, for everything that you have, for your achievements, lessons and trials, for everything that you have learned and understood. And send this prayer to your Creator and Light Forces. It is gratitude that allows you to receive the necessary karmic offsets for your past, let it go and step higher into the future.
2. Remember and write down all your mistakes, sins, everything where your conscience is not clear and for which you need to repent before Higher Powers(during my entire adult life). For all the written sins, write arbitrarily, from the heart, a prayer of repentance before God, before people, and before your soul. Remember that the biggest sin that completely blocks the entry into a person's life of any positive changes is the non-recognition of one's past sins (pride).
3. Write down everything you can remember, where you blame yourself for something, you cannot forgive yourself for something in your past, for which you internally condemn yourself, scourge, hate. For each item, forgive yourself in writing and release the blame and any negativity on yourself. For example: “I forgive myself for…, I open myself to the stream of Light, to the stream of Development, I change and grow, I direct only Light, Love, Kindness…”. A positive attitude towards yourself is the main creative rule: “no matter what happens, no matter what mistakes I make, but only Light on myself, and I will definitely correct the mistakes” (no negativity and self-destruction).

Do at least these three tasks slowly, in detail and as sincerely as possible, and your life will begin to change for the better, and there will be more joy in your soul.

We continue to remove blocks to the development and change of ourselves.

Do you choose to live in illusions or in the real world?

Why are so many people unhappy? They fight, fight, they seem to be making a lot of efforts, attempts to change something in their lives for the better, but nothing comes of them, as they hang in a vicious circle.

What is this vicious circle? These are illusions in which a person is stuck, illusions that a person himself created within himself, cherished and nurtured. Illusions and pipe dreams that a person protects from the real world, in which he hid from real life.

Where do such illusions come from? The reason is fear: fear of life, fear of the surrounding world, fear of people, fear of acting and living in this world, fear of taking responsibility. When a person is afraid of the world and life in it, he, instead of overcoming his fear, remains in the usual “comfort zone”, withdraws into himself, creating some kind of illusions, living in dreams that he is not going to translate into real life on his own. And between him and the real world, meanwhile, a fence of closeness begins to grow, the basis of which is ordinary fear. The more such fences between a person and the real world, the more difficult it will be for him to overcome this abyss and change his life.

Such illusions are serious blocks to the development of a person and to changing his destiny. A lot of people, living in their little illusory worlds, never leave their comfort zone and achieve nothing in life. And meanwhile, outside the window is a huge beautiful and boundless world of the Creator, with millions of opportunities and sources of happiness for an active, inquisitive and fearless person.

If a person chooses to live in illusions, and not real life in the real world - disappointment and collapse await him. Illusions always lead a person to disappointment, inner dissatisfaction, as a result heartache, depression, complete non-realization and sad fate.

For qualitative changes to enter your life, you must break the fences of your fears and concerns between yourself and this world!

To do this, you need to make a choice: what is more important for you, more valuable - your illusions, that “comfortable” little world that you created for yourself or the real world of God in which you want to be successful and happy?

Write in writing and with justification the answer-choice to this question!

To better understand the essence of the problem described above, answer one more question: if a person does not love and is afraid of the world around him, society, people, if he runs away from life and fences himself off from this world, can he count on happiness in this world, on success in him, that this world will accept him and help him?

Let's chew a little: can a person be free and happy in a world that he subconsciously or consciously fears? Will the world go towards a person who does not love him and is closed to him? Can a person achieve success in life if he is afraid to live, to live a real life in a big real world?

The answer is obvious: everything that a person is afraid of remains closed and inaccessible to him! Closed, until he conquers his fear and finds the right positive attitude, in this case to the world, to life, to people.

• To change your life for the better, you need to stop being afraid of it, you need to learn to love it!
• In order to enjoy life in this world (in the world of the Creator), it is necessary to overcome the fears of this world, one must learn to accept and love the world, begin to know it and its laws.

Your soul will experience true happiness only by living in a real divine world, a real life, but not in a world of illusions and unrealizable fantasies. At the same time, I will say that imagination and dreams are very good if you embody them in the real world, in your life. And if you don’t embody, these unrealized dreams and your illusory little worlds will suck out all the juices, devour all the vital energy of your soul, pull from you last strength leading to depression and illness. That's how it works.

Practical exercises:

1. Be sure to write down your decisions in writing: A) From now on, live in the real world of God, and not your little worlds, with your laws invented and convenient for your ego, B) Step by step, overcome the fear of life, the fear of the world, the fear of people, bring down all the configured partitions between yourself and this world, C) Learn to accept and love life, the world society as they are.
2. Write in your own words, from the heart, a prayer-request to God: to teach you all of the above, to rid you of fruitless illusions and subconscious fears in relation to the world and life in it, say in prayer to the Creator, your Heavenly Father, that from now on you want life in His world and to know it, and not hide from it, that the illusions created by fear and self-deception are no longer of value to you. Ask God and the Force of Light to guide you forward and upward and teach you about life, success, happiness in this world.

Understanding the knowledge and performing the exercises proposed in this article will certainly help you get off the ground in your development and personal growth. But you need to understand that each person is an individual with his own history, and each has his own set of virtues, talents, strengths, as well as limitations and karmic blocks. Therefore, ideally for effective development, each needs to be looked at individually: what blocks its development most of all? what are the reasons for immutability? What knowledge is most lacking? What are the best questions and problems to start with? others

Compose such individual program development is best helped by a Spiritual Guide or Spiritual Healer.

In addition, to understand how changes occur with a person and his fate, I recommend studying and working through additional articles:

If you have any additional questions - write to me!

Sincerely, Vasily Vasilenko

www.psychologyfaq.com

How to work on yourself - Psychologos

Working on yourself can be difficult, but the results are impressive!

There are not many people who BELIEVE that you can change yourself. Even fewer people are READY to change themselves. And how many people are CAPABLE of changing themselves on their own?

Ian Deutschman's article "Change or Die" (Fast Company magazine) described a study of patients who needed to change their habits in order to survive. Alas, only 10% of them were able to do this, the remaining 90% of them, after 12 months, returned to old habits that almost guaranteed a fatal outcome. Even in the face of a deadly threat, the vast majority of people cannot resist their old habits and make right choice.

Notice that in that experiment we were talking about people with the ultimate motivation to change: they needed to save their lives. It seems that in calmer conditions, people change their habits even more lazily.

However, another group of patients showed different results in this study: in this group, 80% of the participants changed their habits. What made this group different? Only that they did not act alone, they had a support group. The patients who participated in the group met regularly, interacted and discussed their progress, difficulties and trials. Total: with a support group, the results were 7 times better.

It seems that there are literally only a few "selfmade" people who have made themselves on their own and alone. But why work alone? If you work with a group of like-minded people, your chances will increase at least 7 times. If you study not just in a group, but under the guidance of a master, your performance will double.

Your choice?

Now about all this in more detail.

Look for like-minded people. If you find out who and where is doing what interests you in the field of self-improvement, be sure to come and get to know these people. Pay more attention to the atmosphere, to the relationship between people: it is usually warm and attentive relationships between people that are the key to the fact that you will like it here and you will start working with the result.

IT IS BETTER TO WORK IN A GROUP. LOOK FOR ASSOCIATES!

Enlist the support of friends. It is very important that your friends support you. If not, you need to figure it out: either you are going the wrong way and not there, or you are not very on the way with these friends. Maybe your new friends will soon be those who, together with you, want to make themselves new.

Quality training is great support. How and where to learn to work effectively on yourself? Psychological trainings will help in this best of all, the only condition is that it should be high-quality psychological training. Unfortunately, this is not always easy, today there are more base "psychological" trainings than worthy trainings that can help you. How to get a quality training, see here

Find your coach. Most often, the most important thing is to find YOUR mentor and coach: the one whose thoughts and whose style suits you the most, whom you want to be like and equal. The master will help to more accurately determine the direction, suggest effective techniques and methods, and provide high-quality feedback, will help you not to forget your wonderful intentions, will create the necessary motivation.

WORK MORE EFFICIENTLY UNDER THE LEADING OF A MASTER

Consider coaching. If you can afford it, we recommend finding your own coach. A coach is a psychologist involved in accompanying healthy and successful people. Unlike psychotherapists, a coach will not treat you, and unlike a consultant psychologist, a coach does not deal with one-time psychological consultations, but as a personal escort supports you on your development path. The coach, if he will teach you, will be to a small extent: the coach rather helps you figure out what you want and helps you achieve your goals in the best way for you.

COACHING IS WORTHY

Get on the Distance! If you are interested in the most effective work on yourself, then today it is Distance - a coaching system for step-by-step personality development. Distance is yours independent work above oneself, alternating with meetings in a group under the guidance of a leader. Distance is the most popular self-development system in Russia, developed by N.I. Kozlov. This is the development of communication skills, leadership, self-organization, building relationships in the family, the opportunity to improve health, teach yourself to go to bed on time, wean yourself from complaints, excuses and self-blame, teach yourself to hear, understand and feel people professionally. All this can be yours.

Today, you can work on the Distance, including online, via the Internet, from any city and from any country in the world.

www.psychologos.ru

Personal growth- this is, first of all, work and work on oneself. It is building yourself step by step, day by day, continuously and purposefully.

Personal growth is not an end in itself. It is the necessary existence of life and its continuation. Development is life itself. Everything that does not develop, degrades and falls into decay.

First, you clearly define and realize your wonderful goals in the field of self-development. You think that you are interested and exciting, what your mind and soul are drawn to.

Then you develop a plan for working on yourself. At this stage, you clearly understand that you will do and organize this work yourself, no one will solve your goals and objectives.

Work on yourself First steps Where to start

And the first thing to start with is to determine your resources, write down the conditions of the problem, i.e. what you currently have.

Take a piece of paper and make three lists.

First - write down your shortcomings, negative qualities, Problems. These can be: fear of a new business, laziness, a desire to sleep longer, overweight, etc.

Second - list all the advantages and positive qualities.

The third - features of one's character, not related to the first two, but having a place to be.

Consider the first list. Do flaws always get in the way?

For example, the fear of starting a new business in some cases may be the result of your caution and the desire to understand the issue in more detail, in others, when a quick decision and action is required, it can be a brake.

Laziness and a desire to get enough sleep are often the result of irrational use of time. This is a signal in order to revise your schedule and adjust the daily routine.

Sometimes a person unconsciously cultivates and cherishes his shortcomings - this is a reason to complain about himself, complain, worry about this and thus waste time, justify inaction.

The path of change and development.

Check out How to Become More Efficient and more:

Accept yourself holistically with all the pros and cons

Show love to yourself

If you can change the shortcomings - act, work on them

If it is fundamentally impossible to change (although it is believed that nothing is impossible), use them.

A wonderful parable about shortcomings is here.

Tell us in the comments how you develop yourself? How do you use your weaknesses?

And in conclusion, I suggest you take a break. Listen to space music.

schastliviymir.ru

where to start and how to fix

Hello dear readers! How it helps to work on yourself, where to start and how to consolidate the result - today I will give you some recommendations on this topic. There are many exciting opportunities around, but it is rarely possible to take advantage of them. Usually something gets in the way: lack of strength, fatigue, little time, laziness, no desire or money.

I really want to change the ordinary and boring life, to bring interest and variety. How to find the missing time, strength, the right attitude? There is nothing complicated in this, all you need to do is take four minutes of your time to read this article and the answer will be in front of you. So, let's begin.

Where should you start working on yourself?

Select target

An achievable and concrete thing is easier to achieve. A clear task will set you up for work and help you organize yourself. The goal is main award It can be touched, felt or seen. If a woman sighs about harmony, then determine how much you need to lose a kilogram. A man seeking to overcome the career ladder, choose a position. A girl who dreams of a worthy groom should think about his qualities. A young man who wants to "conquer" the world, to determine the scope of future achievements. Each person can imagine the goal, but it will not come on its own at the appointed time.

Action plan

When the goal is set, it remains to draw up a plan for its implementation. If the task is not easy, then it is necessary to divide it into several intermediate stages. This makes it easier to get started and see the fruits of your efforts. You may need to acquire the necessary knowledge to obtain desired result. It will take some time to work on the plan, but it will be clearer how to achieve the goal.

Strength of will

Work on the implementation of the plan will remain "in the future" if there is not enough willpower. This aspect will have to work hard. The goal you want to get will be a good motivation. You can keep a diary of self-control or make a table in which to write down each step towards your cherished goal. Make an effort not to give up everything at the beginning of the chosen path. After all, it is difficult to keep track of your weight if a woman continues to draw up her menu “by eye”. A man, too, will not achieve a promotion at work without proper qualifications. You need to remember about those bonuses that you will receive at the end of the journey.

gradualism

Do not try to overcome the whole path in a few days. So you can waste all your strength and be disappointed in the successful completion. To come to the cherished finish, carry out your work gradually. Let the results at the beginning be very modest, but the energy will be enough to reach the end. Haste will lead to mistakes and unnecessary worries. If you still feel a lack of strength, there are powerful ways to quickly restore strength and energy, read the link.

Find Companions

Emotional component

The goal, on which a lot of work is being done, should evoke positive emotions. It is not necessary to strive for something only in order to “wipe” the nose of competitors. What if such a goal will bring emptiness and irritation? The end result should please you, and it does not matter what other people think or say about it.

How to consolidate changes for the better?

• Forgive yourself for small mistakes early stages. After all, not everything can work out right away. If the work is not successful, then take a short pause, analyze your mistakes. Rejoice even for a negative result. Consider this a trial run. Then start work again.
• Develop self-control. If you consciously perform any action for a long time, then it will become easy to perform. But at the very beginning of the journey, you will have to do work on self-control. It will take patience and confidence in action. A long journey and long work will require attitude and focus.
• Reward yourself for every job you do. It may be inter-stage, but no less valuable. The ultimate goal is sometimes far away, but any person needs to feel the approval of their actions. No need to save on positive emotions. Even one dropped kilogram can be encouraged, but not by food. Choose a reward such that a small result does not become zero.
• Changing habits. Sometimes habitual actions prevent you from achieving your cherished desire. The love of sweet desserts becomes a serious obstacle in working on harmony. Smoking reduces the stamina of the body and causes apathy. The love of alcoholic beverages makes you forget what the goal itself is for. Look, perhaps habitual but useless actions are preventing you from moving forward. It is better to acquire good habits.

Conclusion

It is best to change yourself throughout your life. Reaching your goal, look for a new dream. Why dwell on the same thoughts, diversify them. There are no ideals, but there is an opportunity to approach them. Everyone takes responsibility for the changes in their lives. Determines the right time for this and develops a path. Work on yourself takes a long time, requires strong motivation in order not to go astray. Without changing anything in the scenario of your life and relying on stereotypes, it is easy not to notice how the years have passed in monotony and routine.

denotat.ru

Work on yourself. Why is this needed and where to start?

A person often forgets that changing the world around him is an impossible task for a single person, but at the same time he constantly strives to change the world around him. Although if you start to change yourself, then the world around you will begin to change. The process of self-improvement is just a way to change yourself.

But how to start self-improvement?

To do this, you need to "look" into yourself. Understand your pros and cons. Get to know yourself.

Stages of self-improvement:

1) Introspection. At this stage, it is important to be honest with yourself. You can just remember your life and write down:

actions that make you ashamed;

turning points in life

problems that interfere with life.

The main thing is to honestly admit your guilt and not feel sorry for yourself. Analysis of life can be emotional and tragic. But the more emotions and pain will be invested in this analysis, the more truthful the picture will be. Thus, it will be possible to identify the main range of problems that prevent moving forward.

2) Motivation. Reading motivating books, self-hypnosis are wonderful tools for self-motivation, but action is necessary. You constantly need to become better in something, change your character in some small deeds. Overcrowded buses are annoying, you have to promise yourself not to get upset about this and keep yourself in control. And, in this vein, try to act all the time.

3) Work plan. After conducting self-analysis, you can draw up a plan for working on yourself. Define and write priority areas and goals, and write down the actions to achieve the goal. After that, you can begin to implement this plan. It is useful to keep a diary in which to write down all your successes. This will serve as additional motivation.

4) Action. Every missed minute moves a person further and further away from his goals. Therefore, you need to start acting, just start following your plan. Initially, not everything will turn out, there will be many obstacles. But each small step towards the goal will make a person more and more confident, fewer and fewer obstacles will arise in his path.

The process of working on yourself should not be approached only from one side. Man must develop in all directions.

Intelligence. It is necessary to constantly improve both your professional knowledge and develop erudition;

Body. It is necessary to develop physically. Sports, various healing and cleansing procedures will help you treat yourself with great respect.

Spiritual or creativity. Being creative helps push the boundaries of thinking, and better know yourself from the inside.

Communication. Communicating with other people, you can not only get new information and take an example from them, but also get to know human nature better, understand other people and yourself.

Self-improvement is a long and painstaking work. Every day you need to force yourself to continue this work.

Only in the process of long and painstaking work is it possible to understand the reasons for your fears, failures and change your life, making it happier and more fulfilling.

Hello, dear readers of Valery Kharlamov's blog! To achieve what you want, to advance, both in your career and in your personal life, a person must leave the comfort zone, act and develop. Therefore, in order to simplify this process, and in general, to make it possible, it is important that work on oneself never stop, that is, be permanent.

As you take a step forward towards change, try not to stop. After all, it is easier to move by inertia than to gather courage and try to move. It is especially difficult if you have spent a lot of time on it, in which case you will feel that you have “grown” to it. And this causes such a strong fear of change that it will be easier to endure something than to take a risk and do it differently.

It is for this reason that many victims of domestic violence do not leave their tyrants. But, if they begin to take care of themselves, knowing and realizing, then the moment will come when internal changes, and entail external ones.

2. Motivation

As we have already found out, human psychology is such that it is easier for him to sit still, albeit not comfortable, than to get up, fall, get up again, and so on. To move, you need good motivation, then you will not have time to think about how to force yourself to act.

Do you know what you want to achieve, what you live for? If you have not yet determined, take it into service.

3. Responsibility

Realize that the responsibility for your life and its quality lies only with you, therefore everything that happens to you is a consequence of your choices and actions. Therefore, if you don’t know where to start working on yourself, assign yourself an iron rule, rely only on yourself and always be responsible for your actions, even if you really don’t want to.

I do not urge you to refuse support and help, but I just want to convey to you that you do not expect it as a matter of course. Someone may or may not help you, so always rely only on your own strength.

Just when you stop sitting and waiting for miracles, that someone will notice you so good and give you a bag of money, you will have a chance to earn it yourself, turning your dream into reality.

4. Health

In order to realize that you are not perfect in some ways, and in some nuances you do not even reach the norm at all, you need to be brave and strong in spirit. It is also important to understand that if you give your best, you can achieve almost everything you want and cope with any difficulty.

Therefore, instead of being upset that you are not up to something, gather your will into a fist and get to work. Yes, it will be difficult, sometimes it will seem to be fruitless and useless, but believe me, your work will be justified and will bear fruit.

5. Planning

Plan your activities, so it will be easier to understand when and what to do. Yes, and there will be less temptation to relax, because every day will be scheduled, even rest. If you don’t know how it’s done, and you’re used to living without setting clear goals, everything can be fixed.

6. Balance in life

So, let's say you tune in and realize the whole level of responsibility, and what's next? And then you should determine which area in your life needs attention and correction. A technique such as drawing up a wheel of life balance will help you with this.

Then you will know exactly what and by what percentage you missed, personal life, health, professional activity or rest. Or maybe the spiritual component of your personality has suffered a little?

7. Reading

Read at every opportunity. So you can not only replenish your stock of knowledge, but you will also unwittingly train your memory, thinking and attention. And I recommend starting with books on the topic of self-development.

For example, such as "Get Out of Your Comfort Zone" by Brian Tracy, by the way, is a bestseller and a leader among books on this subject. Or “This year I…” M. Ryan which will help you deal with bad habits and teach you to keep promises, even those addressed to yourself.

9. Phased

Constant work on yourself is possible only if it is gradual, otherwise, by giving yourself an increased load that does not correspond to your capabilities, you can leave the race halfway without having time to achieve the desired changes. Therefore, be sure to consider this moment, it will allow you to notice reality, and not be fascinated by fantasies.

Let's say you want to lose weight - plan activities to combat hated kilograms so that the body does not experience stress from unexpected unbearable changes. Take care of yourself.

Conclusion

And that’s all for today, dear readers! Inner work on yourself is actually a colossal work, so I wish you success in this process, and inspiration! And in order to check how developed your abilities for self-organization and self-control are, I suggest passing online test.

The material was prepared by Alina Zhuravina.